EDIT//

Random;

Me: I saw this shop in Penang once, called House of Condoms.
Ray: they have it here as well. I was looking around and they were like, promoting this masturbation kit.
Phoebe: they sell scented candles too.
Theresa: *eyes wide* to masturbate with ?!!


Ray was flipping through this book about God and skaters. I'm not kidding. The book is really about christian skaters and having faith in God. She saw this picture of this guy who was wearing a shirt with 'I Am Barabus' on it, holding up a painting of God.

Ray: *really excited* hey its God ! dude, I see God ! its Jesus ! its Jesus !
*sees the slogan on the guys shirt* I AM BAHRAHBAS !
*stops to think* hey isnt that the bad guy ?


During Chemistry, Ray came across a picture of a really cute blonde skater in the book.

Ray: hey, this guys pretty hot.
Me: yeah, I was staring at that picture too just now. look, it says he's 14. dont be a pedophile.
Ray: *laughs* wait, wasnt this book published a few years ago ? he'll be older now.
Me: *heeeeeuge grin*
Ray: *laughs* who's the pedophile now ?
Me: quick, check what year it was published in. I wanna know his current age !
Ray: ha-
Me: *grabs the book from Ray* it was published in 2005. so hes 18 now. we can date him!
Ray: what ? like a threesome ?
Me: well, you can have him once I get bored of him. then when youre bored of him, we'll give him to Phoby.
Ray: *laughs* you do realize that we're not actually gonna be able to date him, right ?
Me: *glares at Ray*