Hello.

Im aware I havent blogged in ages but I only go online on weekends now and Ive been kindve lazy anyway. Been busy with school work.
x
Ive been going crazy over the tidiness of my school work. Ive been ripping out pages and re-writing everything no matter how many pages long it is over and over again cos I felt it wasnt neat enough the first time and Ive been throwing out brand new unused exercise books and buying new ones just cos I didnt like the way I wrote my name on the covers. Ive thrown out 7 books at least. I dont know, I lost count at 7. I think Ive killed about 90 trees. :S

Other than that, schools been okay. Remember when I said Add Maths wasnt so bad ? I was very very wrong. I would say I hate it but I dont want to hate any of my subjects. Im just trying to be really positive about my studies this year. I regret not studying for my PMR and I guess Im trying to make up for it.
x
For once in my life, I know what Im going to do after graduating from high school. I know this may come as a shock to most people who know me but Im going to be a doctor. Notice that I said 'Im going to' instead of 'I want to' ? Yeah, well, thats how badly I want it. And Im not just going through a phase this time.

Since I was a kid, my ambition changes from time to time depending on what phase I was going through. I went through phases at least more than half of my life from childhood right up to now. Just last year, I made daddy buy me an Ibanez guitar cos I was so keen on learning and daddy sent his assistant to find out where I could take classes and everything. I never did go for the classes in the end and my guitar has been sitting in my room untouched and covered in dust until today. And things like this has been happening most of my life. Im surprised my parents are so tolerant and havent pulled their hair out by the roots yet. I hope they dont do that. I know its just a figure of speech but I wouldnt like having a bald mom.

Aaaanyways, back to the point. Before this, I swore I would never be a lawyer, teacher or doctor and everyone who knows me, knows this. The very thought of becoming one of those made me cringe. I dont know what made me change my mind. I know its hard and theres a high chance I wont be able to cope with medical school but Im going to really study this time and do everything in my power to get a degree in medicine.
x
Was talking to Roisin just now;
Me: oooh, I know what I want to be when Im done with school.
Ro: what?
Me: dont laugh?
Ro: ok.
Me: DOCTOR!
Ro: WHAAAT? why?
Me: I dont know how to explain it, Ro. I just really want to. And this time, its not just cos Im going through a phase.
Ro: Michelle, you know in real life, its NOTHING like Greys Anatomy, right?
Me: HAHAHAH. I know and thats not the reason. Okay, so it was the reason I wanted to be a surgeon but that was waaay last year.
Ro: hahahhahahahahaha.
x
Ray wants to do medicine too and Phoebe (phoby, thats what I call her) wants to be a vet. We got bored while teacher was discussing Hari Canteen with the class and I started talking about how doctors are known for having bad handwriting and I tried writing like a doctor so I wrote down 'Prozac - 15mg'. (:
Then we started playing 'hospital'. I played the doctor and Ray was my patient. Phoby was actually paying attention to the teacher, I dont know why.
x
Me: Okay, what seems to be the problem?
Ray: Well, theres this thing with my ear-
Me: Ray, dont give me the complicated stuff. Im not a real doctor yet. Just tell me the symptoms of a fever and stuff. You know, cough/cold/headache/nausea/soar throat. I mean c'mon, Im barely 16.
Ray: Well, thats not fun. Umm.. I have a headache and a cough.
Me: *writes down symptoms* Is it phlegmy?
Ray: No, its dry.
Me: Okay. does it make your throat itch?
Ray: Yeah, I guess. And I feel like vomiting a lot.
Me: *writes down symptoms* Is the nausea frequent?
Ray: well no, only when I feel like it.
Me: Hahah. Ray ! Only when you feel like it? You cant decide when you wanna get queasy. Be serious.
Ray: Hahah. Umm... you wanna see my scar?
Me: What scar?
Ray: Over here, on my shoulder. *pretends to show fake scar*
Me: What happened?
Ray: Well, I was in the waiting room just now and I got bored. So I saw a scalpel and I just sort of stabbed myself.
Me: *writes down - 'possibly suicidal. refer to psychologist'*
Phoby: *turns to us* Hey, teacher said to bring 5 bucks on monday. It has to be monday! Dont forget.
Me: Phoby, not now. Im with a patient.
Phoby: Omg, youre not done with playing hospital? How long are you gonna take with one patient?
Ray: Is she the bitchy nurse?
Me: *dies laughing*